Do not email when you are angry

CO once said, don't send emails when you are angry. I have always known the dangers of emailing, but that phrase really stick to my mind.

I have later discovered, I really followed that piece of advice sometimes, and it's really wonderful. When I don't send an email when I got nothing better to say than to say something that will hurt the other party (or myself later); after just half an hour I would realised what damage I would have done, have I send that deadly email...

Long way to go to learn to control myself, yet I have something to be glad of, at least I know there is this thing called awareness. Whether or not I practise it every other day is another issue... :)

ttg

my notebook doesn't have infrared?

I thought my notebook has, but the port I thought was infrared port was either not functioning, or my notebook doesn't have infrared after all, and I do not know where the specifications or manual for the notebook has gone to... I bought my notebook approximately three years ago. so now all my pictures and sounds from the phone will have to stay in the phone for the moment.

When I watched "The Apprentice: Season 3" just now, with all the arguments and fights because everyone wants to take charge and a lot were not people with patience or tolerance; in my point of view the team was a total mess. Whilst I was watching, again, I thought about my own experience.

We hardly had such big arguments. All three of us were "accomodative" to each other's ideas and opinions. Of course there were a lot of times when two were against one, but since it was so common it didn't appear to be a problem, rather a stimulation to the whole thing.

I wonder why I could only think of the good things when I look back, when I complained so much during the actual period when the project was going on. Humans have selective memory, and I'm glad to be able to remember the good times and remind myself to treasure those people more...

Ohh.. one more thing... in The Apprentice, everyone was like saying "this is the way I talk, I have a loud voice", which reminds me of the speech vocal training I've been introduced to. Classes haven't started yet, but the initial "screening test" has put a lot into my mind to think about... and back to these people who said "this is the way I talk"... why are people so defensive, especially when they are losing their temper, and fail to see the point/advice that others are trying to give...

I won't criticize so much on this, as I know I myself must have been acting the same way before, whether I realise it or not... now.. I am really looking forward to the speech training, since the teacher said it's going to be a self-discovery journey... and that's interesting...

ttg

blur..

Yes... totally blur when I saw that I have been invited to an interview for a training scheme in capital market... a word that doesn't register any image in my mind since I've put my heart into marketing since my final year of study. I did study something on the capital market and financial things before, but they're totally gone now from my mind, I even went to search for the definition of capital market on google.

I went to apply for something that I have almost absolute zero knowledge on, and now, having succeeded in getting myself selected for the interview, I really don't know how to cope. Worst still, I am given a choice of who I want to be interviewed by, they are all in short forms (the associations) and again I went to look up what are those associations... from accounting, corporate governance, banking, unit trust; which one should I choose?

My career path is a complete mess now... really blur on what I would like to do...

I have also applied to the teachers training course, and when I looked at the course module, I would never have applied for something like that, but what to do if I would like to be a teacher?

On the other hand, my new phone is a delight, the sony ericsson k700i (at last I know how to spell ericsson, haha...) Been fiddling with it and had fun trying to take photos and videos and doing some sound recording... I guess the biggest reward is the candid shot of my parents... really nice.. However, I have just registered for GPRS and still could not connect to the internet... I wonder why, and I wonder did i do it the right way?

Also watched A.I. just now, and missed American Idol, old movie but this is the first time I'm watching the show... really touching... 2000 years for that one day with the mother...

Talking about American Idol, I'd better check out who got into the final 3...

ttg

A new phone for me!

The title says it all... Goodbye to my four year old Nokia 3310.

I have also tried my old Celcom phone number, and it still works! I haven't topped it up for ages, probably 9 months, and yet they automatically topped up my account with RM5 from time to time. I do not know why, but it's a good thing that my old number is still functioning...Possibly a good strategy of Celcom in my case, I might consider using the number again, since my parents would need a new handphone number anyway

ttg

Dreams

This is the second time I'm writing about dreams, the first was via email, which no one replied..

Anyway, had a few dreams recently, which I remembered because they were weird, futuristc, frightening, even got a moment of betrayal by friends in yesterday's dream.

I don't really like dreams, they never told me anything, they never seemed to mean anything, and all I would get is just a bad night's sleep and wondering why I dreamt of what I dreamt of.

Like yesterday, my goodness, I could't believe I gave birth to a stillborn baby??? It's a long long way to go before I reach the age of motherhood... really really disturbing because there were other women giving birth, and I was actually feeling very sad when I see their babies and remember my own... thankfully, no pain of giving birth, the dream probably started after the baby was born. Nevertheless, I still can't believe me giving birth to a child..

I woke up several times yesterday, another dream was about me waiting for either one of two friends to pick me up, but they gave excuses and didn't, and the dream ended where I see them with two other teammates dancing on stage (apparently I was waiting for them to pick me up for the performance, and I was supposed to be one of the performers). They didn't see me downstage, but they did saw another teammate, who, like me, supposed to perform but wasn't.. so this fella onstage got such a shock.. anyway, silly of them, they were leaving their teammates behind and were expecting to keep the thing they did covered when the thing was to perform onstage? And... I can't believe I was actually going to dance on stage in that dream????

Another dream a few days ago, this is the futuristic one.. I was carrying with me a thumbdrive and a digital camera, for whatever reason I really do not know.. I guess they must have some kind of eveidence or important stuffs inside, the whole dream was like a thriller, me running around to get these two piece of digital device to duno where, and part of the city was already "flooded" by a man-made-water vehicle?? Serious, it was shown on the TV in my dream, the man drove in a water-made vehicle! And, like in the twister or whatever movie, people were running away from it. One part I love about the dream, I was running, and running on air... haha, as if flying..

There was another dream when I was also escaping from something, and I was carrying a thick red book, (I think it was a Bible), which I guarded so closely as if it were my life.. funny... I can't believe that I couldn't let go of a bible.. maybe I was a Christian once in my so many past lives? The dream kept me thinking for a few days, was I meant to be a Christian? Which, till today, I am not (in my present life)

And the recent most haunting dream... my paternal granny visited me in my dream.. she looked good and was smiling, she didn't speak, but was trying to communicate using sign language, which regretfully, I have forgotten... a series of hand movements... and then there was this huge calendar-like thing supposed to be arranged or opened or whatever, once I could use my fingers to repeat the hand movements to form something.. too much of Da Vinci code, maybe.. however, one of my relatives (either aunt or female cousin or other female relative) said she couldn't help me to the hand thingy but could recite the thing which happened to be either the heart sutra or the great compassionate mantra (I can't remember)... I am still wondering... what was my granny trying to say...

ttg

Paintings in the Da Vinci Code

I've fnished reading the book.. I must say quite fast, compared to the speed I've been reading in the past few months, I mean when talking about stories and novels and thrillers like this.

Interesting piece of work, which gets me in the mood to hunt for info on the paintings, the secret societies, the bible, christianity, and mozart?? One of my favourite classical composers, his name was mentioned a couple of times, but never with details.

Perhaps KN, a Christian, know about some of these things, she was taking so long staring at pictures in the National Gallery in London, which I couldn't seem to be able to appreciate. So much "nudity" to my eyes, they were all picture of Christ and other things related to christianity, and I am not someone who really knows how to appreciate paintings... I've been in the National Gallery, and I missed what I could have seen, have I known a bit more.. and I've been to Paris, but I missed The Lourve and Champs Elysees?????

ttg

The Da Vinci Code

I am now reading The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown. I got to know about this book from a few friends, the first one being MJ, and the most current one my boss, whose son has read the book and was telling his mother that it's a very good book.

Looking at all my interests, I could really see how they are influenced by so many different people at different points in my life. My interest in proverbs and quotations and motivational stuffs definitely came from PJ, who introduced me to the Chicken Soup for the Soul series. My interest in Buddhism from MH who introduced me to a dhamma camp. Interest in some authors, most probably PJ and HB. Interest in types of music, that will be from secondary school classmates (even the whole form/school, because the song was the "trend" at that time), AC, HB, CK, dhamma camps, uni collegemates... a lot.. the list goes on..

Currently watching Holland Street (He Lan Jie) and To Mum With Love: both are very nice drama series, both storylines revolve around the family... and these two drama series make me laugh for approximately two hours every day... not bad for a consistent daily dosage of laughter..

ttg

Good luck!!!

I have forgotten how funny my boss could be. She sent me a document I need to format (from another superior), a document/report that perhaps both of us would have to rewrite... again, the tables and statistics will be my job... and the message is "Good luck to you!"

She's in a good mood nowadays, so unlike who she was a couple of months back, and so much like the lecturer I used to know last year in Paris..

Speaking of Paris... will our team from UM make it to the international finals this year? Things have not been running smoothly for them (seems much worse than how my team did last year)... good luck to them!!!