Ya, I want to be a kind and wise little witch, just like the picture I put up in my YM. This idea came up about 10 days ago when I was doing spring-cleaning for my work laptop. Although the motive behind the spring-cleaning was kind of unfortunate - I was so frustrated at work I just decided to do something else - but not something which is too personal, cause it was working hours. My colleague (much as I dislike her working style and she was part of the cause of the frustration - she's still a good friend) commented that my spring-cleaning effort is like a housewife. So she googled up some housewife pictures - 50's housewife - for me to put up in YM. And me, out of my frustration towards her - refused her idea but this witch image just popped up in my mind. So, I googled up "cute witch" and found this image... And the idea stuck...
Why do I want to be a witch? I want to be like a witch with a broomstick - use the broomstick to clean up stuffs, to make magic, and to fly! Translate that into more practical terms in life - I want to sweep off the unwanted things in my life, sweep away the negative things, sweep away the rubbish, then I want to use the broomstick to create "goodness" in my life. With the bad gone and the good in - then I can "fly" i.e. live my dreams! A bit silly, I don't even have a clear idea on what I want - but right now my personal aspiration is "Create a better world by creating and being a better self". I am so attached to this witch idea that I really want to copyright this, just like the high-heeled healer (a book I got from AL's library but have never read past the first chapter)
Which brings me to the copyright issue. In today's world - is there really something which can really be ours, which can be copyrighted? Not really, once something is created, it will be replicated, it will be changed - I do wonder if we, the human race are using our intelligence correctly? However, put that in business term - without inovation, without competition, there will be no advancement. If this ever happens to me, I guess the best advice to fall to would be the Buddha's advice - everything is impermanent.
It is so easy to become attached to things or to people. As I was doing meditation yesterday (ya, my first real meditation at home which lasted for half an hour), suddenly this memory of a pocket size purple coloured proverb book came into mind. I must have put it away for at least a year. It just suddenly springed into mind, and I had a very strong urge to look for it, and it must have been about 11pm. Anyway, I managed to sit through the 30 minutes and went to bed after that - was telling myself, it has been at least a year - and I had no need for it, and I don't really have a need for it now either - it's only the feeling of wanting to see it again, wanting to put it somewhere where I can know I own it, and probably forget about it again in another month or so.
Read in a book on rebirth which I took home on Wesak Day - human brain cells is completely metabolized in a certain period - but some memories of previous experience would still remain. I guess this must be it - when we get attached to something, when our mind processed something, it will stay in our memory until one fine day - we will either happen to see it again when we scan through our database of memories, or when we see something of similar nature in reality - then it kind of strikes us "Hey, I have seen this before, I know this". Funny, when I think about this I can relate to what the books said about death and last thoughts, what you're attached to will play itself like a flash show during the last moments of your life. If I'm attached to a lot of things (which I am), it'll probably flash through when I die and I would probably be reborn to live it again.
Hmm, and it kinds of make sense - do I really want to relive it again? For another 100 years if I'm lucky and get reborn again for another 100 years and till infinity... Not to mention whatever material things I have accumulated, even "experiences" - I will never be able to bring it with me to the grave or to my next existence. So it really felt silly to keep things - just in case I need them. I figure of my entire "wealth of material things", this would probably be the breakdown:-
- 25% is redundant and can really be thrown away
- 25% is redundant but I think I might need it and actually will never do
- 25% is again something which I think I might need, and yes, I really might need it
- 25% is something which I really need
My target: get rid of the first 25% of redundancy - which is going to be hard - I keep so many things that I don't even know how much things I have - and everytime I look at those things (probably every 2 years or so), they're kind of nostalgic that I just end up reorganizing and repacking them. And I wonder how much time I spent on organizing things that I would never need!
But like my previous post - the seed has to be planted - no matter how small the action, I will make sure I clean up something when I can. And I will make sure I stop accumulating things (ya, I really have to be hard on myself on this - please stop accumulating things!). If I accumulate things which can be read - I'll make sure I read them and not stack them on shelves and cupboards and boxes.
Emm... am actually adding things to the "digital space" now by writing this blog - but writing is something I really love, better than forcing someone to listen to my so called "wannabe witch" story...
ttg
No comments:
Post a Comment