Turtle

"Imagine that the whole earth was covered with water, and a man was to throw a yoke with a hole in it into the water. Blown by the wind, that yoke would drift north, south, east and west. Now, suppose that once in hundred years a blind turtle would rise to the surface. What do you think? Would that turtle put his head through the hole in the yoke as he rose to the surface once in a hundred years?"

"It is unlikely Lord."

"Well, it is just as unlikely that one will be born as a human being; it is just unlikely that a Tathagata, a Noble One, a fully enlightened Buddha should arise in the world; and it is just as unlikely that the Dhamma and discipline of the Tathagata should be taught. But now you have been born as a human being, a Tathagata has arisen and the Dhamma has been taught. Therefore, strive to realize the Four Noble Truths."

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Practicing the Way with the people closest to you

I find that this is a great challenge. One may think that because they're closest to you and because you love them, it will be easy to maintain a good attitude with them and it will be easier to have a harmonious relationship with these people compared to the people you are not so close to.

However, because we are so attached to them, they represent part of us. The more the reason to love them? Right and wrong.. right because it's easier to have the feeling that you want them, you want to possess them and you thought you love them. Wrong because, when they represent part of you, everything they do is you.. including the wrong things which you think is wrong and would never allow yourself to do. So we try to make them behave like us, and because every person is "unique because of previous conditions", this mindset to have everyone think about right and wrong in the same way - is not possible.

I find that I have to revert to the 4 brahma viharas very often to handle my emotions - using compassion when they fail to understand they are wrong, using equanimity when they just will not change and continue to behave the way they do, using love to accept them because they are people closest to me.. and using joy to rejoice in the things that make them happy (but not necessarily will make me happy) - and to have lots of patience...

I am full of gratitude for the chance to attend the Retreat with friends at Wat Cetawan, with Ven Buddharakhita, it really helps me tremendously in dealing with relationships.

~ttg @ Realized Tranquility of the Heart~
Posted by at

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)